summer is here

Yeah, it is summer time and it really really gets a little too hot now. Gosh. These days my body is sticky and the heat is just scorching. I missed springs!

Anyway, I have not written much on this blog. I guess the time has passed pretty fast, I almost forget I have a diary to write daily. How can start writing again?  These days, despite the many things I do, I have no appetite to write at all. There any many interesting things, definitely. Perhaps, I am just not a writer.

I do contemplate on many things though, especially about life, learning about self. Living here, far from family and friends have done me many goods. Seriously. I am less stress here, I can do what I want, I dont have to think what my friends think about me. In fact, I smile more here and look at things very differently now. Hhehhehe… in fact, a colleague who comes for biz trip here told me that I looked different here, I looked younger and fresh! hahhaha… i think so too.

The things I really like about japan is presentation. This is a place where I realise, determinations work. I never believe in nurture. Yeah, sad to say. I grew up in nature. If I can do sth, it is because I am naturally able. But here, I noticed many things called nurture. They grew people here. In fact, I realise that I can do something that I am almost weakest at. Language! To my surprise, I can pick up the language pretty fast. I know since young that language is never my expertise. that is the main reason i never want to learn chinese, being bilingual is already hard-enough. how to be tri-lingual? but now, I realise that nothing is impossible. we just need to spend the time and devotion. it works!

i am an aunt again

Yeah, the title says it all. My sister has just given birth 2 weeks ago. She gave birth to a baby boy. Well, I am definitely very happy for her. Thank God for the delivery, err not exactly delivery as it is c-section. Anyway, I guess I just live too far from her town and as I am pretty occupied with work, learning japanese and going out, I have quite forgotten many things about home.

Congratz sis!

career

Yeah, this issue strucks me again. GOSH! If you know how old I am, you may be surprised. Even at this age I have not settle the path I want to take. I have no goal. I have no clear plan even for the near future. I feel totally doomed. sigh.. ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH

What shall i do? hontouni wakarani. suruka doka wakaranai .

 

i am chinese, not a japanese, zenzen nihonji janai ne

the last few weeks i have been really down with life. yeah. who would not. I have been wondering what is the root-cause.. i have been searching and searching and definitely i know why I am disappointed, but but why?: why should i be upset?

well, this evening i went out with my friend. i told her my struggle and disappontment and i think she brought an importand point about chinese trait. then i realise it fits. I am not a japanese, i am a chinese and no matter what, the trait is in me. I am someone who thinks how to get a maximum gain out of something. I am not by nature a charity worker. even when i do a charity, it is not merely a charity. it is a strong belief that out of it will come out something greater.

yeah, it is solved. i have to accept that no matter what there are japanese values that is just not my nature. i love profits and no matter what, i want to gain something and not merely giving and giving and not receiving something back in return., sigh… -_-”

8 months in Japan

Yeah, the title says it all. I have been in Japan for 8 months and still striving for the next 7 months when my time in Japan expires. Do I look forward to that day? Hmm may be, considering i miss my family back home and my friends in Singapore and many many things I would like to do in the future.

So, what have I been doing all this while? Plenty! First and foremost, work. I think I work the hardest among all who come from singapore. i wonder how it ends up like this. I do not know whether it is good or it is bad. I really could not figure out what happens. Anyway, I just do it. I am doing my very best. Sometimes I really feel frustrated, not because I could not do it, rather it is the amount of works and I have started to think what do I gain at the end of the day. Definitely not in monetary terms! But I guess, it is for a good testimony. It is a testimony to them as a foreigner that I could do  a good job and can work hard. But again, I wonder to what extent I can make it. It has started to drain my energy off. Sometimes I really find my privacy is being violated. However, nobody here can do their private business. Everyone can only think the benefits of the company they work for. Is that a good thing? I don”t know and definitely not by business to search those things out. I don’t have time even for my basic needs. Ok, ok.. actually it is not that bad. But but… it is just my priorities are totally different from the locales here. I love to diversify my energy and time. I don’t like to focus only on 1 thing. yeah.. that is why perhaps  I have been grudging lately.

Beside work, I learn Japanese language. i can speak actually, but not yet as native. hahah.. I wish I can spend more time learning, but the working hours really prevent me from proceeding further. I love the language and have been picking up many new words and grammar. The issue is kanji. As I have no luxury of time, learning kanji is just almost not possible. However, my listening skill has improved much, I can understand what my colleague says, understand 60% of the drama or news. Not bad I guess. However, it is still a long way to go. Many many words I have to learn and remember and use.

As for travelling, I went to Nagoya and MIE ken last month. I was an average trip. I found everywhere in Japan looks the same. Can you believe it? IT IS! hahhaha… I think all the castle looks the same, the temples are the same and the scenery is similiar. -_-” worse, every where you go, it is draining the money away.

The rest of the routine is just pretty simple. I go onsen almost every saturday. hehhee… I go to church every possible sunday and doing window shopping too. Yeah, i am waiting for the summer sales!

work

Oh, give me a break. that would be my answer if one ever asks me how is my work so far. I love the job, but but but… i am just not that hard-working. yeah, not that hard-working. I love to diversify my time and energy into various activities, definitely not solely on 1 like what most people here are doing.

Anyway, I have been getting home later and later. Again, i am totally fine with that. However, it just leads to various implications, for example: it drains my energy, not able to learn japanese, too tired to watch tv and too tired to write something on this blog.

Well, there are definitely many things I learnt here. I love the way Japanese take their work, they are really serious about it, however small the job is. Really amazing I would say. I also love the team spirit of the people. I guess it is just natural for them to work together and not to seek their personal interest. However, it may lead to other issues I guess. The only problem is the workaholism. Well. perhaps I should not say so much about it. Anyway, balance would be best.

btw, i have been here for almost7.5 months. Yeah.. still another 7.5 months to go. hehere… ganbarimasu..

last friends

Wah.. wah.. I am totally in love with this dorama series. Well, I guess all the main leads are pretty and cool.. hehehhe :P.

Well, what do i love about this series. It has a nice song, really, i totally fall for it. For someone like me who does not like contemporary song, it says something. =) Beside the song, I guess i can also feel how strong the feelings of each characters. I really find the plot amusing, the personality, the characters. Again, this is something that Japanese is really good at, i.e. making something out of many ordinary things.

I will post some review/ recap in the future. hehehe, i guess i am learning for my japanese as well.

finally.. yeah

Yeah, finally i could download some video files on my ipod. hehehe.. pretty happy about it. from now on, I can watch japanese dorama on the train. hehhe… yippie…

奇跡がある、本当

毎日曜日わたしの教会は新しいmessageがあります。奇跡です。いつも、もしすべて子他はよくですが、神様は忘れます。でも、もし問題があります、伊勢も私たちは神様は呼びます。どしてですか。ところで、今から私は毎日祈りたいです、かみさまのすくいをよびます。

むじゅかしい。

まだまだです

今、　私はほとんど７月日本に住んでいます。毎日は仕事をします、　今年から仕事はだんだん大変になりました。も、　毎晩は日本語を勉強します。日本語は本当にむ樹下しい言葉です。ひらがなとカタカナは私ためには大丈夫うですけど、かんじはすごい大変です。たくさんけど、覚えない.　会話はじょうじゅになりました。日本語は一番きれいな言葉と思います。特別にはいつ女の人は話します。日本語は本当に大好きです。だから、たくさん時間がかかります、私も告ぎ勉強主増す、ゆっくりです。

今年は毎土曜日に温泉へ行きます。私のところは温泉があります。でも、温泉で若い人がいません、叔母さんとおじさんだけがいます。おかしいね。温泉が大好きです。も、温泉でいろいろな人が会います、おばさんはいいです、たくさん差べり増す。面白いです。

今は私はいつも急がしで好けど、ボログはかけません。時間は著と厳しいね。でも今から、書きたいです。毎日かも知りません。規模だけ：P.

じゃ、終わりますね。待ったね。